pnaichopstix (pnaichopstix) wrote,
pnaichopstix
pnaichopstix

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I was so nervous when I sent out that letter. Like, I at the same I wanted her to write back, but at the same I didn't. I knew i would cry if she did and be a little sad that she didn't. Either way, I was going to have some kind of emotion. It was so bad that I even had a dream about it. In the dream, she responded to the e-mail and told me to come visit her. I did and her best friend was there too. We talked like nothing was wrong, but when it was the two of us, we started talking seriously. I cried (of course). She hugged me and told me that we were all right and everything was okay between us. I was so scared she hated me and to hear that she didn't hate me made me feel so much better. But then the dream ended and I was faced with reality. I was still anxious as fuck and contemplated just not checking my e-mail and having one of my friends look at it or just not looking at it at all. But I'm glad i did. Because I was so happy to see that she responded. So happy that I cried (and I'm still crying about it). Danika, you probably will never see this, but thank you for responding. I was really happy to hear from you and to see that you're doing well. And I really hope you have an amazing birthday.
Tags: crying, i miss you, this is my life
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